Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Information from the "ADD ADHD Information Library"

Defining Success With Your ADHD Child

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Definitions of "Success" need to change with time, and circumstances...

How Do You Define "Success"?

My wife and I have home schooled our two children for the past ten years. This year, however, they are both enrolled in a small private school through our church. This school requires a lot of parental involvement, and as a result I'm teaching a class to junior high and high school students three days each week. Two years ago I began teaching at this school. At that time I taught an English class where we began the year studying the theme of "Success," or rather "What Is Success?" It has made me much more aware of the concept of "Success."

As a parent, how are you defining "success" for your children?

As the parent of a child with ADD/ADHD, have you changed the definition of "success" for your ADD child?

How do you define "success" for yourself as a parent?

How have your ADD/ADHD children come to define "success" for themselves?

Our definition of success is "THE PROGRESSIVE REALIZATION OF MORAL, VIRTUOUS, OR GODLY GOALS"

Each of these questions is important for us to think through. Many of us, kids included, only define success in terms of what we have, or what we have accomplished so far in life. Some define success in terms of how society and culture define it, while others have chosen to define "success" through the eyes of God, as best as they can know it.

As for me, I define "success" as "the progressive realization of moral, virtuous, or Godly goals." As I look at my kids and rate their levels of success, or rate myself as their parent, I want to keep in mind what my kids are becoming, rather than what they have accomplished in the past. As long as I can see my kids on a path toward becoming productive and honorable adults, then I will feel successful as a parent.

RELAX A BIT

I want to encourage each of you to take a long term view in regards to your role as parents. I have received many emails from parents of 4, 5, and 6 year old kids who are having trouble with attention span, or coloring within the lines, or reading, or whatever. Please relax. Focus on getting your child onto a road that will lead them to be productive as adults. Teach your children how to be good fathers and mothers to their own children in the future. Teach your kids how to love and serve other people. These are the major lessons. See life in the context of eternity, and your definition of success will change radically, both for your children and yourself.

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